She misses eating out with friends and, in what Dr. One client has been feeling indifferent about meals. The key is to pay attention to where you feel little sparks, and lean into that. Pushing yourself out of this newfound comfort zone is not a kind practice and it is ineffective in the long run.īut I have seen clients nudge - rather than push - themselves toward some energy and some lightness. It doesn’t work to threaten yourself with “shoulds.” As in, “I s hould go see this person since I’m fully vaccinated” or “I should want to go out to dinner on the weekends, since I always did before.” I don’t believe we can push ourselves out of languishing. What they really want, in my opinion, is to stop being so stuck. It has also helped them to take their first step out of the fog.īut where does that first step lead to? People want to “fix this.” They want to “heal.” They want to “move on,” as so many patients have told me. When I described this to my clients, many exclaimed “Oh yes! That’s it!”Īnd it makes sense naming a feeling helps normalize it and brings the vague unease into focus. It feels as if you’re muddling through your days, looking at your life through a foggy windshield.” Grant writes, is “a sense of stagnation and emptiness. Grant published a piece in the New York Times that accurately describes what so many people have been feeling during the pandemic: languishing. It’s something that they just can’t describe.īut University of Pennsylvania psychologist and TED Talk speaker Adam Grant, PhD, has been able to define it. They aren’t joyful or enthusiastic about anything. They are struggling to feel energized and concentrate on the day-to-day. Many people, including several of my clients, have been feeling some sort of way over the past year.
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